- Do you earn enough money?
- I DO! I currently earn less than I did in 2001 and over 2/3 less than what I earned last year, but I am happier and healthier than I have ever been.
- One thing I have learned, I will spend as much money as I make. The more I make, the more I spend.
- I’ve been “broker” and I’ve been “wealthier”, and more money did not equal more happiness… but I knew that already.
- I am working to become debt free and it is amazing just how much more you can do with less when you pay cash for everything.
- Do you enjoy your job?
- I DO! I made a major career change last year. I decided that I was done with “management” and that I needed a break.
- All of my education, training, certifications and licenses assisted me with career advancement, and quickly, but the closer I got to my “career dream/goal” the unhappier I became.
- The higher up the ladder I got the further away from the “people” I got.
- What do I like best about my current clerical support role? I get to go home after my “day” and work stays at work. It’s heaven.
- Do you prefer Saturday or Monday?
- I prefer Saturday’s, but not because I dislike Monday’s. I look forward to going to work and I like the people I work with.
- I get to sleep in on Saturday’s (well most of the time) and I get to go on adventures.
- Actually, if you must know, I LOVE Friday evenings. That is the day during fishing season that I head up to be with my baby… I miss being with him during the week so I look forward to the weekends specifically because we get to be together doing things that we love.
- What would you like to be doing one year from now? Can you make that happen?
- One year from now I plan on resting up from my Rim to Rim trip across the Grand Canyon that I will be taking at the beginning of October 2013.
- I am behind on my conditioning routine but I will make this trip happen, one way or another.
- What would you like to be doing five years from now? Will you make that happen?
- In five years I would like to be working and living on the boat with Fred. We have plans for our future. The next five years will be key in making those plans happen.
- It will involve living on a strict budget, putting away as much money as we can into an emergency fund and then investing/saving for our future (read retirement).
- It will involve paying off of our debt and staying away from credit.
- We can and WILL do this.
- What would you do with your life if you were a billionaire? Is it possible to live a modified version of that life anyway?
- I don’t need that much money. As I said, money doesn’t make people happy. Sure you need money to live but just how much money does one person need? Not that much.
- If I were a billionaire I would live off of a modest income each year. I would figure out how much money it takes to live the lifestyle that Fred and I would like to live (which doesn’t require much) and invest enough money to provide that income. We would still need to budget for the “extra’s”.
- I would spend more time volunteering and exploring.
- Whatever was left over I would invest and then use those proceeds to fund various charities and help others because I could.
- I feel like a billionaire already – I have everything I need, I just need to do a better job managing what I have.
- How much could you cut your outgoings by? How much time at work does that equate to?
- I can cut down A LOT! I am a spender… to my detriment.
- I love books.
- I am an impulse spender.
- Being that I do not want to increase my work hours or even my income (at this point) I am going to have to buckle down and just stop spending.
- I believe that with future goals in mind, and a partner who is committed to reaching those goals with me, we will both create and stick with a budget knowing that if we sacrifice the incidental stuff now we will be able to do what we want in the future.
- Do you have enough spare time to do the things you really enjoy? If not, why not?
- Not really. I waste time. I get sidetracked.
- A lot of my time in the past year was consumed with finalizing my divorce, moving, family “stuff”, and now it is getting things sorted and taken care of. I can see the light at the end of the tunnel however, and I do believe that I will have more time to do the things I really enjoy.
- On the other hand, I believe that you make time for the things that you really want to do. If doing “things” I really enjoyed was important at this moment in time I truly believe I would make the time for them. I did that when I had a goal of hiking 50 trails in 52 weeks.
- No complaining here, I just need to “do it!”
- What takes up a lot of your time but is neither unavoidable, rewarding nor enjoyable? Why don’t you cut that/them out immediately, or pay somebody to do it for you?
- Well, I can’t say it takes a lot of my time because I avoid it like the plague! I can find anything to do other than housekeeping or paying bills.
- Can’t afford a housekeeper at this point and again, I just need to do it and get it out of the way. It isn’t rewarding because no matter how much you clean things get dirty again.
- Bills? I am working on cutting those out completely… working on paying things in advance so that I don’t have to worry about them every month.
- As soon as I get my finances in order I plan on hiring an accountant/financial adviser to assist with the money stuff.
- What mildly pleasant, but pretty pointless things do you fritter too much time doing? How many times a day do you check your email/Twitter/Facebook? How much TV do you watch?
- During my work day I really don’t fritter away my time. I am busy and I like that. No time to play around. That is one of the things I like about my current position.
- Home? now that is another story. I only check my email twice per day. I check Facebook in the AM and once at lunch or on break and then again at night. TV is on but I rarely watch it.
- What do I spend most of my time on? (Off-work hours) Blogging – reading, writing or responding to my blog or other blogs.
- Sitting around doing nothing when I should be doing something.
- What would you like to do more of?
- Being more physically active.
- Spending time outdoors.
- Hiking in the mountains and having adventures (and then blogging about them!)
- What motivates you to do something well?
- Personal goals and satisfaction – a feeling of accomplishment.
- CHALLENGES – if it isn’t challenging I don’t find it interesting. I like doing things that require me to stretch and get out of my comfort zone.
- Learning new things. I like being the best at what I do, but really only in terms of competing with myself. Am I doing the best that I can do?
- Who do you envy, and why?
- Honestly? NO ONE! I don’t have time to compare myself to others. It is a waste of valuable time that I can be using to improve myself and help others.
- If you were 100 and looking back on your life, would you be happy with a life well-lived?
- Well, being that 100 is 54 years away, I would certainly hope so.
- I really didn’t start living until just a few years ago and I spent way too long in an unhappy marriage.
- I can’t look back, I can only look forward and if the past two years have been any indicator of things to come I know that things will just keep getting better. It was a rough two years in “divorce land” but they were also two pretty incredible years in regard to growth and personal development.
- If I am not happy during the next 54 years, I will only have myself to blame.
- What makes you proud, satisfied, and content?
- I am proud that I have survived the challenges in my life and that I am making better choices for myself.
- I am not sure that I will ever be satisfied… I am always seeking to improve myself but I can say that I am content. Life is good and it will continue to get better.
- There is nothing that I will not be able to handle. I have the tools and the resources and I had some great training thanks to my fabulous parents.
- What makes you frustrated, bored, and unfulfilled?
- I am a lot less frustrated now that I am out of my toxic marriage.
- I am in control of my own responses to life.
- If I am bored, that is my own fault. There are a lot of great things out there and no reason to be bored. No reason what-so-ever.
- Unfulfilled? Amazingly enough I am feeling more fulfilled now that I have given up the illusion of “success” that is defined by others. Getting out of the rat race and focusing on creating healthy relationships has really changed my perspective.
- What would you do if you had more talent?
- What? I’m not ultra talented? Hahahahaha
- Actually I would like to be able to get my ideas “out”… whether it be in writing or visually through drawing, handwork, painting or electronically.
- I am BRILLIANT (in my head) and if I could do anything I would like to be able to express myself in the way that I see it.
- What would you do if you had more guts?
- Scale tall mountains and not be afraid of “scary” heights or ledges.
- Guts aren’t something that I lack… I think if anything, I need more confidence. What I portray sometimes is not what I am feeling.
- What would you do with your life if nobody was watching, judging or commenting?
- Exactly what I am doing just more of it. LIVING!
- My motto has become
“Life’s journey is not to arrive at the grave safely in a well-preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, totally worn out, shouting ‘Holy s— what a ride!’” ~ Hunter S. Thompson
- As long as I continue to be kind, thoughtful, considerate and truthful, I think it will all work out just find.
And last but not least…
20. What are you going to do about all this? Continue on my path. Be true to myself and be gentle during those times when I am not living up to my own expectations.
- 20 Questions Worth Answering Honestly (And My Responses) (jonmaiden.wordpress.com)
I'm particularly annoyed today.
I'm working on an assignment for school.
And you know what??
I would ALMOST prefer being pushed off my bed onto a floor full of Legos.
That sh*t would really hurt.
But ughhh I have to construct a career map.
Yep. I have to figure out what job I'd like to have in
Or is that… Less Drama? Definitely!!!
The days since August 30th feel different. Lighter, brighter… happier. It is hard to explain.
For so many days over the past two years my days felt like one drama scene after another. Well, actually the past 20 some years have felt like one drama scene after another – no matter how hard I tried to find a peaceful and quiet space to live in. The life one finds when living with an active addict.
At one point I posted about my “country song” experiences; that felt like a low point. In June, I rolled up in a little ball… waiting for the storm to blow over. Finally, it did.
The drama in my life now? Normal drama… life… waiting for traffic, dealing with people, being busy at work, being busy at home. Earning an income, paying bills, family life, relationship growth… NORMAL drama.
Life. Life is a series of experiences.
What do I notice now? I notice that I feel good. My gut is not all balled up or churning. I am peaceful. I am happy. While I still get headaches they are fewer and further between.
Does this mean that I am not sad at times or that I do not get depressed? I still have those moments but they are different than they were… then.
I’m sad tonight. Why? Not because anything has happened. I’m sad because I can’t be with my man. I miss him.
Sometimes people get confused… I talk about my WASband, and I talk about my MAN. Two very different people. I don’t miss the WASband, not one bit, not at all.
My man? Now he had drama this week!
Everything is better now though. I picked up his sister from the airport last night and drove her to the fishing grounds. She is an experienced captain and fisherWOMAN.
Finally, a crew member that knows what they are doing and can help on the boat. Already Fred is more relaxed and he sounds so much happier.
I’m sad I can’t be with him, but I am oh so happy he’s happy.
I’m looking forward to working with my new sister… she promised she’d help me become a competent deck hand. Can’t wait. I want so much to be helpful to Fred on the boat and do more than clean up the house.
Is it Friday yet? One day closer to being with my man.
Keeping in line with the sin theme. I thought I would give you some good sin lovin music !
So when you are staring at yourself in that crappy bathroom mirror, thinking about how awesome you are, sing a little something like this. I know I will be
He pushed me 'round
now I'm drawin' the line
He lived his life…
I’m takin’ my turn on the sin wagon... and LOVING it...I love this song... always have...
You get your truck back, you get your dog back and you get your wife (WASband) back…
No thank you on that last item!
I realized this morning while working with some of my creditors with regard to the MARITAL DEBT that my life is beginning to sounds like a country music song. A BAD one!
Me: I am calling regarding account #XXXX.
Creditor: You are seriously past due on your account.
Me: Yes, I am aware of that. I am calling to let you know what is going on and that I am working with a credit counseling agency in an attempt to pay off these debts. I just wanted to let you know what is going on and what the plan is…
(song begins here…)
I’m in the process of getting a divorce… we have been legally separated for nearly 19 months and unable to settle the case out of court. “Difficult” hasn’t really described the situation and the process keeps putting me deeper into debt. My portion of the marital assets are frozen pending final settlement and I am unable to dip into my personal assets to keep current on the MARITAL debts.
The sad part is that there was no reason for it to go like this… we have no assets. Hopefully it will be done and over in June. Hopefully.
My house is pending sale with a closing date at the end of this month. The proceeds from the sale of the house should be used to pay off the marital debt but my WASband has petitioned the court that he should receive the proceeds and the debtors should go unpaid – seriously.
You see, if I am unable to use the proceeds from the sale of MY house to pay off the marital debt I will have no way of paying these debts as I am losing my job as a result of having to relocate out of my state of residence permanently to get away from my WASband. As I have no place to live in my former location and cannot afford to pay rent and the debts while I am still paying the mortgage (pending the sale) and since whatever job I do find in this location will be paying significantly lower than what I am currently earning I am in a financial pickle (breath).
The court should have all of this worked out in June when the divorce goes to trial but it could take another six months to determine the disposition of the proceeds. If I am not awarded the proceeds from the sale of the house TO PAY OFF THE MARITAL DEBT I will have to declare bankruptcy.
I have been working with an attorney and his suggestion was that I work with a credit counseling/debt management program first until the court makes a decision about the marital assets. Since I believe that the creditors should be paid (first), and that this is morally the correct thing to do, I am making every attempt to keep up with the payments until things are settled.
Oh, did I mention that my father passed away in January, I moved in February and my 23-year-old cat passed away a week later and then my mother fell and broke her neck in March. My job contract ends in May and I have not been able to land a new job as of this date in time?
See where the BAD country song is coming into play?
Fortunately the rest of my life is going well. Moving away from my WASband has been a blessing. Living with my mom and being with her is wonderful. While I miss my former home and friends I am fortunate to be back home again with my family and friends in this location for support.
Most of all, I am fortunate that my “new” guy moved with me. When everything else seems icky and hard, he helps make it better. I love that there is laughter and love in our home… always!
I know that everything will work out in the end and I also know that I will survive. No matter what happens I’ll figure out a way to make it work.
I never really cared all that much for country music anyway… feels like a great time to write a new song!
I’m not giving up, no white flags here. I’m just letting go. Whatever will be, will be. I can only continue to do the best that I can and make the best decisions that I am able to make.
No matter what is happening right now, I know that I will be okay. I know that things will work out.
Letting go… appreciating all of the wonderful and fantastic things in my life currently. Enjoying the people that I love.
I am so fortunate in so many ways. Every annoying little thing that I have to deal with in getting this divorce over and done with is just ONE thing in getting it closer to done. And they are LITTLE things.
In relation to the rest of my wonderful life these issues are meaningless. They’ll soon be forgotten. In the past. They are not my future.
Every interaction with the WASband and his attorney affirm my decision to move forward. I can’t change the past or lament about how I should have cut the umbilical cord years ago. I can’t influence his behaviors or his actions. He is who he is and will be who he will be… I won’t have to deal with him anymore… he is and will be someone else’s problem.
Like water off of a duck’s back… I may be overwhelmed at times but I must remember… let it go…
The best thing I can do is continue to be happy and healthy.
I am both, and so much more so than I was when this divorce process started.
I surrender… I surrender to life and commit to living it as if there were no tomorrow. I’m going to enjoy every moment of it.